In high school, the world is...well, school. Generally. Ok, maybe just where I go to school. Anyways, I'm taking AP English with this amazing teacher who we shall just call Battman. Today, he was SO excited about going to a play with his Shakespeare seminar class that he just couldn't handle any work, so we just got to talk which is just SO nice. He started telling us a story about breaking up with a girl friend in high school. I asked him what "type" of person he was in highsschool and CPossehl asked which one of us he would be. He implied that he was the quiet type. I was curious as to whether he really knew what our "types" were and so I asked him and he said he wasn't really sure, that he could only guess. We wanted him to guess and he tried to, a little bit, but suggested instead that we all do one another. All this, of course, is in the chatty, 300 conversations at a time highschool classroom manner. I love that battman lets us be like that, so we can just say what we need to when we want to and, although I don't always hear everything, I generally feel like I learn so much. Maybe it is just my fast, wired teenage brain that craves such loud chaos.
Anyways, I wanted to kind of commemorate what we said about one another, cause I think it would be awesome to have in a couple years.
CProcknow: Jokingly, of course, a ginger, haha. Funny and awkward. Good natured. Friendly. Witty. Just generally a good guy. Pretty smart.
DODonnel: Mysterious, strong silent, kind of quiet, lots of memories came up, like about his 55 pg paper in 7th grade to review for the history exam, or when he was a scrawny kid in elementary school with big glasses as PWalker said.
SMyers: subtley inappropriate alot, funny, nice, "SMyers can be mean!" as HScott said
EArchibald: SO sarcastic, v. few things come out of his mouth that aren't sarcastic, 'has the one liners everybody wishes they had but don't"-PWalker, genuine about stuff he really loves (soccer), HScott told story about him in 7th grade when he said something saracastic about how cold it was and some girl kicked him in the balls
SWhite: V. Laid back (compared to KWhite), quiet, genuine, good natured, can be astonishingly driven and Battman mentioned how SWhite had been so driven and had walked in to the head of the English department's office and wanted to start a writing club. Battman said he thought, "See, that kid isnt as laid back as everyone thinks". He is pretty chill, not v. dominant in his classes haha (CPossehl).
HScott: Flustered easily (CPossehl), very Jocky, pretty driven, v. smart, "Asian" haha, she is definitleye the recipient of a lot of ribbing about that (she said she doesn't mind being called that because people think she is smarter than she actually is. She is half Chinese. This was interesting cause JLuo is first generation Chinese and no one calls her that, not really)
CBeaton: Artsy, angsty (CPossehl), you think she is quiet but then you get to know her and she is v. talkative, she is deceptively quiet.
JLuo: The MCooper of our grade. The Newspaper, A student, lots of energy, kind of deceptively quiet but when you talk to her she is just so bubbly (like KWhite). Lots of stuff we don't associate with her but that she does, like the funky Chinese instrument she plays and her ice skating.
Me: Passionate. "I feel like she's pretty fearless" CProcknow. "Capricious" said CPossehl and she said that one of the moments she remembers about me was sophomore year (actually junior year) when we were walking to science (chem) with EClark and someone else and I randomly started singing Annie, "Tomorrow" loudly. She was like "Oh, you have a really good voice" and I said thank you and kept on singing. PWalker said quiet and everyone was like WHAT WHAT are you talking about, "Well, see, I said quiet, but I really meant boisterous" haha. PWalker said his fav moment of me was in the musical when I just walked in and berated everyone. I was so red. (P.S. PWalker=Tevye).
OGerard: Golf. Straight A student. Preppy. Just very academic. Theater, a bit. General Ivy-Leaguer
CPossehl: Loud, passionate, opinionated. SWhite talked about how he was afraid to talk in sophomore English cause he thought she would just shoot him down haha and she was so embarrassed and kinda tried to apologize. This was funny cause she was later the one who told him he wasn't dominant in any of their classes and PWalker imitated her "You're not dominant because I'm Dominant!!!!". Confident. Very articulate and eloquent, Battman said that she was the only person who would come into his office and talk and talk and talk and talk and he would just be fascinated by everything she says. Knows her own mind.
PWalker: Hard to be pigeon holed =Battman. Associated with Speech and Debate even though he doesn't do it. Musical, jock (soccer), Model UN. Like this kid GSeigel from a couple years ago who had a huge ego but was just an annoying jerk, but PWalker is actually well known and well liked. Gets along with everyone. Loud.
We still have to do KWhite and TTran/Princess T, but I know what people will say about KWhite: jocky, very smart, so much energy, talks really really fast but has to think about it for a while, just good at EVERYTHING (art, sports, school), running.
I'm not sure what they'll say about TTran.
Anyways, this sounds more boring than the long discussion was, but there is a bit of a glimpse into life at my school and the niches the kids in AP English fill. Awesome excersize!
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Everything is not as it seems....
The girl, Elizabeth, who I thought was so incredibly independent relies more on what people think than....well, most people that I have met. So much for being yourself.
Now Tybeans has a girlfriend. Which is great for him.
I am just so incredibly depressed and angry. And for some reason I just can't believe any of it.
I am mad at Elizabeth for blaming me for not taking her to Slumdog Millionaire although I had 33 hours of Fiddler that week. And was planning on setting up. Which I learned would have been a really bad idea. She is a perfectly rational, capable human being. Who knows how to drive. And I don't feel guilty. I just can't believe she is pinning her complacency on me.
Why am I not happy for Tybeans? He got everything he has wanted. And his girlfriend is a sweet, and pretty nice from what I know about her.
Today was such a lovely Sunday.
I drifted in and out of conciousness all day, sleeping, dreaming, waking and back again. Sat out side in the grey repressed feeling world that just soaked up all the sounds, even of my MP3 player. Did my homework and just moved as though I was not quite lucid yet. No contact with the outside world. Till now. I need more days like this. Goodbye sweet Sunday.
Now Tybeans has a girlfriend. Which is great for him.
I am just so incredibly depressed and angry. And for some reason I just can't believe any of it.
I am mad at Elizabeth for blaming me for not taking her to Slumdog Millionaire although I had 33 hours of Fiddler that week. And was planning on setting up. Which I learned would have been a really bad idea. She is a perfectly rational, capable human being. Who knows how to drive. And I don't feel guilty. I just can't believe she is pinning her complacency on me.
Why am I not happy for Tybeans? He got everything he has wanted. And his girlfriend is a sweet, and pretty nice from what I know about her.
Today was such a lovely Sunday.
I drifted in and out of conciousness all day, sleeping, dreaming, waking and back again. Sat out side in the grey repressed feeling world that just soaked up all the sounds, even of my MP3 player. Did my homework and just moved as though I was not quite lucid yet. No contact with the outside world. Till now. I need more days like this. Goodbye sweet Sunday.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Important Convos...
On my acting:
Tybeans:
honestly your acting is the best out of all thge three
like i actualy hd that thought when yo guys were singing matchmaker today
you are the only one that has thought that this isnt just a song we are singing there is a reason to why you are singing it
you are really a talented actress
easily the strongest actress in the cast
nope honestly
haley has a role that has a ton of potential but she is shying away from it tay lor is just focusin to much on actions and not enough on motivation and caitlynn is trying to hard to be in love instead of being in love
youy actualy seem to understand your character more than any of the,
them*
hahaha to be a really good actor it takes a ton of preperation and time actualy
which i have not put enough into
but i dont know i dont think i have a true grasp of this show yet or what it is like i dont see what mr.ellis's image for this show really is
but it does show
and you are dojng an awesome job
like when i was atching matchmaker i
literly thought wow QueenE really can see her match in the broom
anbd no joke that is somethng that is pretty damn hard
and most of all you are able to pull of being in love with kevin which like you guys said is the most awkward couple ever
you have by far the most powerful scene
when you are begging tevye to recognize you
yeah it does
it works out very well
peter is a strong actor and you both do very well in that scene
Fyedka: i'm not just saying this cause ur saying it to me
but you hold ur own against Hodel and shes insanely good. i feel like ur just as good as she is
im being serious
that kinda sounded like a backward compliment
QueenE:
haha
Fyedka
but it was meant as a compliment
haha
Queen E:
i need to apologize
sry i was so nasty/cold to u at that...year off dealio {I was post-Fiddler depression. I had spent the Saturday night at the end of the show sad and crying with the cast. Mr E., our director, had abeautiful end speech and I was just bawling. I cried alot of Sunday. And then my eyes were so puffy on the Monday and I hadn't done any homework the week before. I cried alot of Monday night and just couldn't handle it anymore...I skipped Tuesday and Wednesday. Wednesday night I had this "year off" b/w college and high school thing that Ma wanted me to go to. I saw Green Eye's Dad there and just really really didn't want to deal with him....but then he showed up and...I was way way cold....He came to the play though!!!! I used guilt...bad...but it worked! And it meant a lot to me! Like I said, I've never been so proud of anything I've done before. )
Green Eyes
ok/apology accepted/um/right/glad we got that out of the way/so whats up?
QueenE
in the midst of a concious of race identity crisis
Queen E
its weird/u?
Green Eyes
I'm in the midst of an english paper/so not quite as significant as your dillema
Queen E
watcha writin about?
Green Eyes
Eliots Waste Land/lines 25-30 to be exact
Queen E
ummm....cool?!/have u ever heard of anyone named liliana/ok ok ok no scratch the above question
Green Eyes
lily lerner?/ummmm/i don't think so/maybe.../but i don't think so
Queen E
so if u found something like kind of really stereotypical/racist on someones facebook page who u know...and have interacted with....do u say something or do u let it go?
Green Eyes
probably say something/but its your decision
Queen E
no no no i need advice/so u would say something?
Green Eyes
i just gave you advice/the advice was
Queen E
but what if it was posted by someone else...who u have also met
Green Eyes
its your decision/so go with what you feel is right/which, knowing you, would probably mean saying something {I didn't end up saying anything. I realized that Green Eyes also has a kinda weird racial thing on his page...but that he didn't mean it maliciously...and that....I mean, was it any of my business? I don't know...I feel ok with my decision...I thought really hard about it}
Queen E
i know but....recently ive really been overreacting...especially to things about race...so.../haha/i mean ok so yeah maybe i always overreact/im just in a weird place right now {I had just yelled at Brandog for thinking that Lil Alyssa (the only other dark skinned girl in the cast) was my sister....she is native american...and looks nothing like me...and I've had it happen before but I just really, in bad form, flipped out at him}
Green Eyes
no no. it's your identity. I highly doubt you are overreacting you'd really have to be lying to yourself to over-react to something like that. That is, overreact more than usual =)
Queen E:
haha/its just all weird...cause...its that kid i played opposit in the play/and he has this bumper sticker that is like "niglet" which is like the black version of piglet holding kfc and watermelon
and im really offended...but his sister sent it to him...and...its kinda old so then im just really creepy/and i dont talk to him /argh/i dont know what to do /this is more than a little annoying
Green Eyes
understandably
Queen E
so god i know im sposed to like follow my heart or whatever but what do i do!!!!
Green Eyes
well, to be honest the best advice i could give is just /yeah/follow your hear or whatever/but if you want something more concrete than that/then I advise that you call him out. Do it in private if it makes it easier. you said you don't talk to him so what do you have to lose? Who cares if you seem creepy
Queen E:
ok /thanks
Green Eyes
sure/just do it/that's my advice
Queen E
thats solid advice
Green Eyes
tell the kid what an ignorant bastard he is
Queen E
but i mean, he's not... {I kinda had a crush...just a little one...on fyedka. he was sweet. WAY more touchy feely than me which was kinda odd...we had one really good hug at the end of the play...aww...haha...but im done, it was just fun while it lasted}
Green Eyes
the last part?
Queen E
it seems like he got it and then just forgot about it...
Green Eyes
thanks
Queen E
which is why i feel weird
Green Eyes
oh/well..../tell him anyways/ok well then you are doing a favor by reminding him
Queen E
is that what is cause i just feel bitchy and oversensitive!
Green Eyes
now, my real advice is 'follow your heart'/but since you didn't want that/...
Queen E
haha no thats good advice too/that just makes it harder/speaking of hearts/are u like 'involved' with anyone right now?
Green Eyes
who cares if sound bitchy?/really/i mean, is the rep more important?
Queen E
meh...i dont generally, but he put up with all my weirdness and was genuinely sweet all throughout the play
Green Eyes
sounds like a sweetie
Queen E
he says with contempt
Green Eyes
frankly, its his sister who you should talk to if you talk to anyone/but lets not get in to that
Queen E
i know...i even met her...but she doesnt go to kent...shes in college
Green Eyes
you are dificult./ya know that?/i know you do./but just thought i'd throw it out there
Queen E
yeah i do
Green Eyes
haha
Queen E
i mean i am like super cold to u even though i greet nicholi like my best friend/i know how incredibly odd i am /im still tryingt to figure me out
Green Eyes
haha/what a mystery you are!
Queen E
it was a bad night...
Green Eyes
what was?/tonight?
Queen E
no...that year off night...i was gonna try not to make excuses/so moving on
do u want to meet liliana? shes really cool/ive always wanted to set u up with one of my friends/haha, how weird is that
Green Eyes
sure
Queen E
ok/nifty/princess t doesnt think u two will click/ok wow im gonna just stop taling haha/anyways...../hows ur paper?
Green Eyes
princess t doesn't think we'll click?/maybe that's because princess t and I don't click
Queen E
awww...
Green Eyes
no i'm just saying
Queen E
haha that might be true actually /liliana is like one of the most passionate people i know /and i guess she just reminded me of u {so much for my not meddling eh? but i didnt ever do it...}
Green Eyes
hee/well she sounds cool/I'd love to meet her.
Queen E
haha ok. this is so odd haha/oh/and now my friend cali fish girl wants to meet u/but im not subjecting u to that
Green Eyes
I'd love to meet cali fish girl too
Queen E
umm...well...are u in sports or something this next season?
Green Eyes
oh
Queen E
no no u really dont, alot of the time i really dont want to meet cali fish girl
Green Eyes
hahahaha/yeah... um/then no/i would not love to meet cali fish girl/and yes/i am in frisbee
Queen E
yes to sports?/no way!/
Green Eyes
but as a third tri senior
Queen E
meaning...u dont take it seriously?
Green Eyes
yes way/yes/i mean, if i wanted something serious i'd do lax/then again, i probably wouldn't take that seriously either
Queen E
did u ever start doing yoga?
Green Eyes
nope/i did racquetball instead/great fun
Queen E
haha /thats awesome/oh oh wait are u going to the bball game tmrw?
b/c my school and yours?
Green eyes
hm?/oh/um/probably not
Queen E
b/w not b/w/ok /thats good /haha nvmd
Green Eyes
where is it?
Queen E
my school
Green Eyes
oh/what time?
Queen E
um it doesnt matter?/i mean its at 7-9 /but theres not pt/*no
Green Eyes
care to elaborate or prefer to stay elusive as usual??
Queen E
my elaborations are usually rambly and annoying, elusiveness is so much more tidy
Green Eyes
and annoying
Queen E
sassy1/*!/i was going to spontaneously plan a meeting for u and liliana...but she is a crazy volunteering fool...im donating blood and princess t would probably be stuck in bed
and liliana and i are really behind on work.../so the planning and the explanation were void
Green Eyes
there
Queen E
yes it was
Green Eyes
not so painful was it?/and here! you get a sticker!
Queen E
u know sometimes i think ur the nicest person i know
Green Eyes
but then other times.../=)
Queen E
and then other times i think urthe only one who is brave enough to be condescending and patronizing to me
Green Eyes
you're certain of it
Queen E
haha
Green Eyes
hahaha
Queen E
ur a v. interesting person
Green Eyes
thank you?/thank you./you're no bore yourself
Queen E
have u seen the movie charlie bartlett?
Green Eyes
not for a few days/(no)
Queen E
haha what? ok /dude guess who i saw the other day
Green Eyes
captain planet.
Queen E
how do u do that reading mind thing?/wtf NO/tap dancer from stanley kid/member him?
Green Eyes
clairvoyance
Queen E
u should become a professional
Green Eyes
yeah/how is he?/a professional what?
Queen E
a professional clairvoyant/i think he's good? i was at the college he goes to /he seems pretty happy
Green Eyes
i don't think there is high demand for those right now
Queen E
really? dont u think people would love to be told what to do? what their "fate" is?
Green Eyes
haha/who knows/oh wait!/i do!
Queen E
haha wow
Green Eyes
wait wait!/I am beginning to see the future!/yes!... its becoming clearer!
Queen E
oh wow! tell me oh wise one what u see!!
Green Eyes
I.../I... I am going to sign off in a few seconds!
Queen E
no way!
Green Eyes
clairvoyance.
Queen E
amazing thing./well thanks /for/um/being u?/haha/ill ttul
(I'm sure this seems like drivel...it definitley does to me but I figure maybe I'll actually treasure this...its a record of how Green Eyes is...what we talk about...our lives...the slang etc...its a time capsule in itself)
P.S. I ate tamarind candy today. I felt like I was consuming a smoker. Disgusting. Don't do that again.
Love,
Queen E
Tybeans:
honestly your acting is the best out of all thge three
like i actualy hd that thought when yo guys were singing matchmaker today
you are the only one that has thought that this isnt just a song we are singing there is a reason to why you are singing it
you are really a talented actress
easily the strongest actress in the cast
nope honestly
haley has a role that has a ton of potential but she is shying away from it tay lor is just focusin to much on actions and not enough on motivation and caitlynn is trying to hard to be in love instead of being in love
youy actualy seem to understand your character more than any of the,
them*
hahaha to be a really good actor it takes a ton of preperation and time actualy
which i have not put enough into
but i dont know i dont think i have a true grasp of this show yet or what it is like i dont see what mr.ellis's image for this show really is
but it does show
and you are dojng an awesome job
like when i was atching matchmaker i
literly thought wow QueenE really can see her match in the broom
anbd no joke that is somethng that is pretty damn hard
and most of all you are able to pull of being in love with kevin which like you guys said is the most awkward couple ever
you have by far the most powerful scene
when you are begging tevye to recognize you
yeah it does
it works out very well
peter is a strong actor and you both do very well in that scene
Fyedka: i'm not just saying this cause ur saying it to me
but you hold ur own against Hodel and shes insanely good. i feel like ur just as good as she is
im being serious
that kinda sounded like a backward compliment
QueenE:
haha
Fyedka
but it was meant as a compliment
haha
Queen E:
i need to apologize
sry i was so nasty/cold to u at that...year off dealio {I was post-Fiddler depression. I had spent the Saturday night at the end of the show sad and crying with the cast. Mr E., our director, had abeautiful end speech and I was just bawling. I cried alot of Sunday. And then my eyes were so puffy on the Monday and I hadn't done any homework the week before. I cried alot of Monday night and just couldn't handle it anymore...I skipped Tuesday and Wednesday. Wednesday night I had this "year off" b/w college and high school thing that Ma wanted me to go to. I saw Green Eye's Dad there and just really really didn't want to deal with him....but then he showed up and...I was way way cold....He came to the play though!!!! I used guilt...bad...but it worked! And it meant a lot to me! Like I said, I've never been so proud of anything I've done before. )
Green Eyes
ok/apology accepted/um/right/glad we got that out of the way/so whats up?
QueenE
in the midst of a concious of race identity crisis
Queen E
its weird/u?
Green Eyes
I'm in the midst of an english paper/so not quite as significant as your dillema
Queen E
watcha writin about?
Green Eyes
Eliots Waste Land/lines 25-30 to be exact
Queen E
ummm....cool?!/have u ever heard of anyone named liliana/ok ok ok no scratch the above question
Green Eyes
lily lerner?/ummmm/i don't think so/maybe.../but i don't think so
Queen E
so if u found something like kind of really stereotypical/racist on someones facebook page who u know...and have interacted with....do u say something or do u let it go?
Green Eyes
probably say something/but its your decision
Queen E
no no no i need advice/so u would say something?
Green Eyes
i just gave you advice/the advice was
Queen E
but what if it was posted by someone else...who u have also met
Green Eyes
its your decision/so go with what you feel is right/which, knowing you, would probably mean saying something {I didn't end up saying anything. I realized that Green Eyes also has a kinda weird racial thing on his page...but that he didn't mean it maliciously...and that....I mean, was it any of my business? I don't know...I feel ok with my decision...I thought really hard about it}
Queen E
i know but....recently ive really been overreacting...especially to things about race...so.../haha/i mean ok so yeah maybe i always overreact/im just in a weird place right now {I had just yelled at Brandog for thinking that Lil Alyssa (the only other dark skinned girl in the cast) was my sister....she is native american...and looks nothing like me...and I've had it happen before but I just really, in bad form, flipped out at him}
Green Eyes
no no. it's your identity. I highly doubt you are overreacting you'd really have to be lying to yourself to over-react to something like that. That is, overreact more than usual =)
Queen E:
haha/its just all weird...cause...its that kid i played opposit in the play/and he has this bumper sticker that is like "niglet" which is like the black version of piglet holding kfc and watermelon
and im really offended...but his sister sent it to him...and...its kinda old so then im just really creepy/and i dont talk to him /argh/i dont know what to do /this is more than a little annoying
Green Eyes
understandably
Queen E
so god i know im sposed to like follow my heart or whatever but what do i do!!!!
Green Eyes
well, to be honest the best advice i could give is just /yeah/follow your hear or whatever/but if you want something more concrete than that/then I advise that you call him out. Do it in private if it makes it easier. you said you don't talk to him so what do you have to lose? Who cares if you seem creepy
Queen E:
ok /thanks
Green Eyes
sure/just do it/that's my advice
Queen E
thats solid advice
Green Eyes
tell the kid what an ignorant bastard he is
Queen E
but i mean, he's not... {I kinda had a crush...just a little one...on fyedka. he was sweet. WAY more touchy feely than me which was kinda odd...we had one really good hug at the end of the play...aww...haha...but im done, it was just fun while it lasted}
Green Eyes
the last part?
Queen E
it seems like he got it and then just forgot about it...
Green Eyes
thanks
Queen E
which is why i feel weird
Green Eyes
oh/well..../tell him anyways/ok well then you are doing a favor by reminding him
Queen E
is that what is cause i just feel bitchy and oversensitive!
Green Eyes
now, my real advice is 'follow your heart'/but since you didn't want that/...
Queen E
haha no thats good advice too/that just makes it harder/speaking of hearts/are u like 'involved' with anyone right now?
Green Eyes
who cares if sound bitchy?/really/i mean, is the rep more important?
Queen E
meh...i dont generally, but he put up with all my weirdness and was genuinely sweet all throughout the play
Green Eyes
sounds like a sweetie
Queen E
he says with contempt
Green Eyes
frankly, its his sister who you should talk to if you talk to anyone/but lets not get in to that
Queen E
i know...i even met her...but she doesnt go to kent...shes in college
Green Eyes
you are dificult./ya know that?/i know you do./but just thought i'd throw it out there
Queen E
yeah i do
Green Eyes
haha
Queen E
i mean i am like super cold to u even though i greet nicholi like my best friend/i know how incredibly odd i am /im still tryingt to figure me out
Green Eyes
haha/what a mystery you are!
Queen E
it was a bad night...
Green Eyes
what was?/tonight?
Queen E
no...that year off night...i was gonna try not to make excuses/so moving on
do u want to meet liliana? shes really cool/ive always wanted to set u up with one of my friends/haha, how weird is that
Green Eyes
sure
Queen E
ok/nifty/princess t doesnt think u two will click/ok wow im gonna just stop taling haha/anyways...../hows ur paper?
Green Eyes
princess t doesn't think we'll click?/maybe that's because princess t and I don't click
Queen E
awww...
Green Eyes
no i'm just saying
Queen E
haha that might be true actually /liliana is like one of the most passionate people i know /and i guess she just reminded me of u {so much for my not meddling eh? but i didnt ever do it...}
Green Eyes
hee/well she sounds cool/I'd love to meet her.
Queen E
haha ok. this is so odd haha/oh/and now my friend cali fish girl wants to meet u/but im not subjecting u to that
Green Eyes
I'd love to meet cali fish girl too
Queen E
umm...well...are u in sports or something this next season?
Green Eyes
oh
Queen E
no no u really dont, alot of the time i really dont want to meet cali fish girl
Green Eyes
hahahaha/yeah... um/then no/i would not love to meet cali fish girl/and yes/i am in frisbee
Queen E
yes to sports?/no way!/
Green Eyes
but as a third tri senior
Queen E
meaning...u dont take it seriously?
Green Eyes
yes way/yes/i mean, if i wanted something serious i'd do lax/then again, i probably wouldn't take that seriously either
Queen E
did u ever start doing yoga?
Green Eyes
nope/i did racquetball instead/great fun
Queen E
haha /thats awesome/oh oh wait are u going to the bball game tmrw?
b/c my school and yours?
Green eyes
hm?/oh/um/probably not
Queen E
b/w not b/w/ok /thats good /haha nvmd
Green Eyes
where is it?
Queen E
my school
Green Eyes
oh/what time?
Queen E
um it doesnt matter?/i mean its at 7-9 /but theres not pt/*no
Green Eyes
care to elaborate or prefer to stay elusive as usual??
Queen E
my elaborations are usually rambly and annoying, elusiveness is so much more tidy
Green Eyes
and annoying
Queen E
sassy1/*!/i was going to spontaneously plan a meeting for u and liliana...but she is a crazy volunteering fool...im donating blood and princess t would probably be stuck in bed
and liliana and i are really behind on work.../so the planning and the explanation were void
Green Eyes
there
Queen E
yes it was
Green Eyes
not so painful was it?/and here! you get a sticker!
Queen E
u know sometimes i think ur the nicest person i know
Green Eyes
but then other times.../=)
Queen E
and then other times i think urthe only one who is brave enough to be condescending and patronizing to me
Green Eyes
you're certain of it
Queen E
haha
Green Eyes
hahaha
Queen E
ur a v. interesting person
Green Eyes
thank you?/thank you./you're no bore yourself
Queen E
have u seen the movie charlie bartlett?
Green Eyes
not for a few days/(no)
Queen E
haha what? ok /dude guess who i saw the other day
Green Eyes
captain planet.
Queen E
how do u do that reading mind thing?/wtf NO/tap dancer from stanley kid/member him?
Green Eyes
clairvoyance
Queen E
u should become a professional
Green Eyes
yeah/how is he?/a professional what?
Queen E
a professional clairvoyant/i think he's good? i was at the college he goes to /he seems pretty happy
Green Eyes
i don't think there is high demand for those right now
Queen E
really? dont u think people would love to be told what to do? what their "fate" is?
Green Eyes
haha/who knows/oh wait!/i do!
Queen E
haha wow
Green Eyes
wait wait!/I am beginning to see the future!/yes!... its becoming clearer!
Queen E
oh wow! tell me oh wise one what u see!!
Green Eyes
I.../I... I am going to sign off in a few seconds!
Queen E
no way!
Green Eyes
clairvoyance.
Queen E
amazing thing./well thanks /for/um/being u?/haha/ill ttul
(I'm sure this seems like drivel...it definitley does to me but I figure maybe I'll actually treasure this...its a record of how Green Eyes is...what we talk about...our lives...the slang etc...its a time capsule in itself)
P.S. I ate tamarind candy today. I felt like I was consuming a smoker. Disgusting. Don't do that again.
Love,
Queen E
Only a Character in High School
In the last three months I have....
Acted in Fiddler on the Roof, learning how to truly give myself to my character. I miss Chava sometimes. She was an astonishing person and I am often sad that I did relish the time that we had together. As her, I made people cry. I, me, a 17 year old girl, made people feel the pain of the person that I breathed life into. That is astonishing and probably the most beautiful thing that I have ever done.
I am going to try to act again. I am afraid. I never joined the musical to act, I suppose I kind of held my teacher in contempt. But, that feeling of being on stage, of channeling this person, was the most touching, worthwhile thing I have ever done.
After we finished, my heart was breaking.
It literally hurt.
I was depressed for days.
I still miss it.
So I am going to try again. Maybe the magic that I have always been searching for, that which will make my life a LIFE is within something that I never dreamed of.
I have often told one of my friends, Princess T, not to outline your life because often you cannot see where you are going from where you are standing. The things and people that change our lives are ones that we could never imagine. If we could, they would not make such a powerful impact on our lives.
That is not to say that that which we do love in this moment and set goals for is not important. It definitley is. It defines us in this moment. We simply do not have the power to do that for the future.
I have found the perfect analogy for highschool, something I came up with last night after living it:
Highschool is like driving down an icy road, snow falling, in a really light car with four people in the car. You drive on, one gets a call from a paranoid parent and falls silent. The next just falls silent, obviously bored with the drive. The other two, if you are lucky, (but probably just one) stay awake, laughing, giving you directions, prompting you to brake. During your time on the road, you pass cars that have turned over, horrific accidents, surrounded by police cars. You are terrified out of your mind and yet you keep going because there is nothing else that you can do. You try to pay attention to the signs, to avoid crashing head on with someone else's car and you just do the best that you can.
That is highschool.
I took a train to a college with two of my friends. We fantasized up one anothers lives. We all were blushing by the time we finished. None of us have ever had a real significant other, haha, and I know that I felt honored to think that other people out there believe that I am so worth the amazing person that they drew in the air next to me.
My high school career is coming to an end, but I try not to think about that. I can't. It terrifies me, just like the accident on the side of the road.
I think that one of my greatest fears is getting in a car accident.
This year I have created some real bonds. My friend group has fallen from 25 to 15 to about 5. Elizabeth and I have nothing to talk about. Beeks and I are tense and bitchy to eachother, she is more interested in the attention she gets. I get it, its hard to ignore that when you have become the miracle and people are finally SEEING you. I am sure I would be the same way. The only contact I have with Jomama is when she changes her status to "I miss my Kent friends" (And I yell at her for not doing anything. And she leaves). Slong, Jamin, Tech guy and Skinny Dancer are a quad and are very exclusive. I sometimes talk to Slong. She has finally found her voice. The others I never talk to. Vigi is just annoying and I can't really hang out with her until I tell her that I am sick of her taking monetary advantage of EVERYONE.
On the bright side, I truly admire and am happy with my friends. Leahdora is wicked critical and judgmental sometimes, but we generally find a balance. Corbear is just so sweet and understanding and awesome to talk to. Princess T is hilarious, we are always bickering but that is why we get along. We are eachothers adventures, so incredibly different. Liliana is a sweetheart, so passionate and I am glad that I have kind of reconnected with her. Tybean is just...amazing...and I love him so much (not in that way).
This year has brought on a lot of sadness and happiness. I don't make friends that easily, I guess my expectations are too high, but when I do choose someone, I (hope) am a great friend.
*Sigh*. Well, my CBT (bio) homework is calling....
Oh before I go, some other accomplishments:
I gave blood!!!! After that botched one on my bday and then leaving the day that they were doing it at school and being sick (although I've waited FOUR years to give blood at school), I finally did it. And felt fine!!! Can't wait to go back.
Last night I yelled at some guy who cut in front of me and Cory in line at the hockey game. I was like "DUDE! No, no. Bad. Go back in line" haha and Tyler and Cory were laughing at me at the same time as their mouths were gaping wide open. That sassiness finally came in handy!! I was so annoyed...there were like five people between him and us! Honestly! He was a big teenage dude two, with two diamond earrings...I might have ruined it by apologizing to him...I felt kinda bad....he seemed awfully embarrassed haha.
I decided not to meddle in Elizabeth and Brandog's life. And just in general. Brandog is too complicated and I wasn't listenign and Elizabeth is too complacent. If it will happen...it will happen. That was a huge step for me (it was also cause of kco, the guy who played fyedka, and kumphlett's (a freshman from the play who is HILARIOUS and who would play hand games with me to make me less nervous, although she is reall my sis' friend) and me being so attentive to their nonexistent relationship and dancing at Sadies...that is a story for another time haha.
Now. Really. I will do hw.
Back to high school....didn't ya miss me?
Acted in Fiddler on the Roof, learning how to truly give myself to my character. I miss Chava sometimes. She was an astonishing person and I am often sad that I did relish the time that we had together. As her, I made people cry. I, me, a 17 year old girl, made people feel the pain of the person that I breathed life into. That is astonishing and probably the most beautiful thing that I have ever done.
I am going to try to act again. I am afraid. I never joined the musical to act, I suppose I kind of held my teacher in contempt. But, that feeling of being on stage, of channeling this person, was the most touching, worthwhile thing I have ever done.
After we finished, my heart was breaking.
It literally hurt.
I was depressed for days.
I still miss it.
So I am going to try again. Maybe the magic that I have always been searching for, that which will make my life a LIFE is within something that I never dreamed of.
I have often told one of my friends, Princess T, not to outline your life because often you cannot see where you are going from where you are standing. The things and people that change our lives are ones that we could never imagine. If we could, they would not make such a powerful impact on our lives.
That is not to say that that which we do love in this moment and set goals for is not important. It definitley is. It defines us in this moment. We simply do not have the power to do that for the future.
I have found the perfect analogy for highschool, something I came up with last night after living it:
Highschool is like driving down an icy road, snow falling, in a really light car with four people in the car. You drive on, one gets a call from a paranoid parent and falls silent. The next just falls silent, obviously bored with the drive. The other two, if you are lucky, (but probably just one) stay awake, laughing, giving you directions, prompting you to brake. During your time on the road, you pass cars that have turned over, horrific accidents, surrounded by police cars. You are terrified out of your mind and yet you keep going because there is nothing else that you can do. You try to pay attention to the signs, to avoid crashing head on with someone else's car and you just do the best that you can.
That is highschool.
I took a train to a college with two of my friends. We fantasized up one anothers lives. We all were blushing by the time we finished. None of us have ever had a real significant other, haha, and I know that I felt honored to think that other people out there believe that I am so worth the amazing person that they drew in the air next to me.
My high school career is coming to an end, but I try not to think about that. I can't. It terrifies me, just like the accident on the side of the road.
I think that one of my greatest fears is getting in a car accident.
This year I have created some real bonds. My friend group has fallen from 25 to 15 to about 5. Elizabeth and I have nothing to talk about. Beeks and I are tense and bitchy to eachother, she is more interested in the attention she gets. I get it, its hard to ignore that when you have become the miracle and people are finally SEEING you. I am sure I would be the same way. The only contact I have with Jomama is when she changes her status to "I miss my Kent friends" (And I yell at her for not doing anything. And she leaves). Slong, Jamin, Tech guy and Skinny Dancer are a quad and are very exclusive. I sometimes talk to Slong. She has finally found her voice. The others I never talk to. Vigi is just annoying and I can't really hang out with her until I tell her that I am sick of her taking monetary advantage of EVERYONE.
On the bright side, I truly admire and am happy with my friends. Leahdora is wicked critical and judgmental sometimes, but we generally find a balance. Corbear is just so sweet and understanding and awesome to talk to. Princess T is hilarious, we are always bickering but that is why we get along. We are eachothers adventures, so incredibly different. Liliana is a sweetheart, so passionate and I am glad that I have kind of reconnected with her. Tybean is just...amazing...and I love him so much (not in that way).
This year has brought on a lot of sadness and happiness. I don't make friends that easily, I guess my expectations are too high, but when I do choose someone, I (hope) am a great friend.
*Sigh*. Well, my CBT (bio) homework is calling....
Oh before I go, some other accomplishments:
I gave blood!!!! After that botched one on my bday and then leaving the day that they were doing it at school and being sick (although I've waited FOUR years to give blood at school), I finally did it. And felt fine!!! Can't wait to go back.
Last night I yelled at some guy who cut in front of me and Cory in line at the hockey game. I was like "DUDE! No, no. Bad. Go back in line" haha and Tyler and Cory were laughing at me at the same time as their mouths were gaping wide open. That sassiness finally came in handy!! I was so annoyed...there were like five people between him and us! Honestly! He was a big teenage dude two, with two diamond earrings...I might have ruined it by apologizing to him...I felt kinda bad....he seemed awfully embarrassed haha.
I decided not to meddle in Elizabeth and Brandog's life. And just in general. Brandog is too complicated and I wasn't listenign and Elizabeth is too complacent. If it will happen...it will happen. That was a huge step for me (it was also cause of kco, the guy who played fyedka, and kumphlett's (a freshman from the play who is HILARIOUS and who would play hand games with me to make me less nervous, although she is reall my sis' friend) and me being so attentive to their nonexistent relationship and dancing at Sadies...that is a story for another time haha.
Now. Really. I will do hw.
Back to high school....didn't ya miss me?
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